Shamal Posted February 19 Author Share Posted February 19 53 minutes ago, Tactical Pith Helmet said: My wife asked why I keep drying grapes all over the house. I told her that I have my raisins. 🤦 Tactical Pith Helmet 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_K4MF_ Posted February 20 Share Posted February 20 What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming. Tactical Pith Helmet, Shamal and DanBow 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamal Posted February 20 Author Share Posted February 20 9 hours ago, _K4MF_ said: What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming. Good one...it never gets old. 😉😂 _K4MF_ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cannonfodder Posted February 20 Share Posted February 20 21 minutes ago, Shamal said: Good one...it never gets old. 😉😂 Like an anti vaxxers kids Shamal, _K4MF_ and Tactical Pith Helmet 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_K4MF_ Posted February 21 Share Posted February 21 9 hours ago, Cannonfodder said: Like an anti vaxxers kids Still as fresh as the day it was first made.... Much like Anne Frank's drum kit. Cannonfodder, Shamal and gavinkempsell 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamal Posted February 21 Author Share Posted February 21 Propaganda. Is that a good look for Londoners? Tackle, _K4MF_, Tactical Pith Helmet and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Tackle Posted February 21 Moderators Share Posted February 21 40 minutes ago, Shamal said: Propaganda. Is that a good look for Londoners? Shamal, Tactical Pith Helmet and _K4MF_ 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted February 21 Share Posted February 21 See also: Jargon: a man from Norfolk running down the road in a tracksuit. 3 hours ago, Shamal said: Propaganda. Is that a good look for Londoners? Tackle, Shamal and _K4MF_ 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamal Posted February 22 Author Share Posted February 22 Cooking advice. Can anyone help me, I put vegetables in my multi cooker and selected the cake option. When it was done, they were still vegetables. So what am I doing wrong? Tactical Pith Helmet, Tackle and _K4MF_ 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 A man has thrown milk over Greta Thunberg. How dairy!? _K4MF_, Shamal and DanBow 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DanBow Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 28 minutes ago, Tactical Pith Helmet said: A man has thrown milk over Greta Thunberg. How dairy!? Another man threw sodium chloride on her. That's assault! Tactical Pith Helmet, Galvatron, Shamal and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamal Posted February 24 Author Share Posted February 24 I went for a run yesterday.I didn't intend to but the fucking ice cream van wouldn't stop! Tactical Pith Helmet, EDcase and _K4MF_ 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EDcase Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 19 minutes ago, Shamal said: I went for a run yesterday.I didn't intend to but the fucking ice cream van wouldn't stop! Was it in front or behind you? 🤣 _K4MF_, Shamal and Tactical Pith Helmet 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamal Posted February 24 Author Share Posted February 24 1 hour ago, EDcase said: Was it in front or behind you? 🤣 That actually works quite well 😄 Tactical Pith Helmet and _K4MF_ 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 I talk to my plants and they grow better. I talk to my cows and they produce more milk. It's in one ear and out the udder! _K4MF_ and Shamal 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Shamal Posted February 26 Author Popular Post Share Posted February 26 "It's been proven that 9 out of 10 women who sit at home and have conversations with their cats are really odd." My dog's full of useful information like that. Galvatron, Cannonfodder, Tackle and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 Does anyone know how long it takes to fix a hearing aid? I dropped mine off two weeks ago and I've heard nothing since! DJsnipe, Shamal and _K4MF_ 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 I saw a man going up a hill with a trolley full of horseshoes, four-leaf clovers and rabbits' feet. He was pushing his luck! Shamal and _K4MF_ 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cannonfodder Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 What do you get if you cross human DNA with goat DNA? Banned from the petting zoo Tackle, Tactical Pith Helmet, Shamal and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 Went to the Doctors today for an examination. 'Relax and try not to become aroused Dave,' said the Dr. Surprised as hell I answered, 'My name's not Dave.' 'I know,' said the Doc, 'I'm Dave.' Tackle, Cannonfodder, concretesnail and 1 other 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted March 1 Share Posted March 1 Went to my bosses funeral today. I knelt by the coffin and whispered, 'Who's thinking outside the box now then, Dave?' gavinkempsell, _K4MF_ and Shamal 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tactical Pith Helmet Posted March 1 Share Posted March 1 I've lost a bit of weight recently by wearing bread on top of my head. It's a loaf hat diet.... Shamal, _K4MF_ and DanBow 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamal Posted March 1 Author Share Posted March 1 Hotpoint have decided to stop selling fridges and concentrate on freezers instead. They announced the news at a recent ‘staycolder’ event. DanBow and Tactical Pith Helmet 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post GenuineGerman Posted March 2 Popular Post Share Posted March 2 What’s the difference between a marrowfat pea and a chickpea? I’ve never had a marrowfat pea in my face Tactical Pith Helmet, Cannonfodder, DanBow and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shamal Posted March 2 Author Share Posted March 2 I decided to make sure Mrs Shamal woke up with a big smile on her face this morning. I'm not allowed to have marker pens in the house anymore. Cannonfodder, Tactical Pith Helmet, DanBow and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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