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Tell Us a Gag. Please!


Shamal
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Knock Knock ..... 

 

Knock knock..... 

 

Knock knock..... 

 

Seriously , Whitney, let me in, I need a poo. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Starting a hide and seek league in the gated community where we live..... Not going well .... 

 

Seems good players are hard to find 

Edited by Superted87
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I fucking told the garage I worked at that I had a nut allergy.

 

They still sacked me when all the wheels fell off.

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I'm not watching I'm A Celebrity.

 

If I want to watch a load of talentless twats eating bollocks and eyeballs, I'll go and stand outside a Greggs.

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What's Blue and not very heavy?
 

Spoiler

Light Blue       😅

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

My teacher at school said I'd never be any good at poetry due to my dyslexia.

 

It shows how much he knew as I've made 2 vases and an ashtray this afternoon 

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  • 4 weeks later...

A man who was wrongly accused of masturbating on a bus, has won a £5000 pay out by the police.

 

I bet he splashes out on something nice.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Never go out for a walk in the rain in bell bottom trousers. I did and now they're ringing....

 

 

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A was sat at the bar in a pub looking depressed so the barman approached and asked him what's wrong.

 

"I had a huge argument with the wife and she said she's not talking to me for a week" replied the man.

 

"Well at least you'll get some peace and quiet for a while" said the barman hoping to cheer him up. The man sighed, finished his drink and said

 

"That was 7 days ago"

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