Supporters Ian_Gere Posted March 17, 2013 Supporters Share Posted March 17, 2013 breakdown - name is so relevant as for emotions, deal with it how you see fit. you can't really take advice from anyone else as you know how to deal with yourself best.. UNLESS you're suicidal. Precisely the attitude Bradshaw drew attention to when speculating on a higher incidence of emotional dysfunctionality in Europe than the USA. No doubt he would be treated to a bout of the most difficult emotional condition to come to terms with, ambivalence: simultaneously gratified for this straw upon the ass of general stubbornness' back and, as a practitioner, concerned for your welfare. Might it be possible that a person could become suicidal as a result of attempting to rely purely on their own devices and finding them insufficient to the task... if, for eg, oh I don't know... their only reference point was the coping strategies they had observed while growing up and those were of the type 85-90% are equipped with which, to one extent or another, ultimately add more pain to that already being experienced? Why then, we might ask, is it that 85-90% of us are not suicidal? Well, since logic was mentioned earlier, I must point out that this is an example of what is generally thought of as logic but which is in fact the exact opposite, understood way back in Ancient Greece no less, but made famous amongst logicians and rhetoricists by the Romans as 'Reductio ad Absurdam', but be that as it may (lol)... the reason is because, whether we do anything about it or not, the intensity of emotion we feel about any given circumstance fades with time. Just as well really, or we would be crippled for life by the first time we felt embarrassed or rejected etc.. Of course, just because dysfunctional coping strategies ultimately cause more problems than they solve does not mean that they do not work in the short term, if by "work" we mean 'stop us from feeling so bad at that moment'. It is just that, because the emotion is squashed down, the next time something happens which elicits similar emotions, even slightly, or different emotions powerfully, they come bubbling back up - 9/10 times we cold call people as a job and they say, "Fcuk off!"; that night we are in the pub and we ask somebody for change of a fiver and get told to fcuk off; we get far more annoyed than we would have if that was the 1st fcuk off of the day... if this happened at the end of a really bad week, we might easily lose it - get banned from the pub, a good kicking maybe, jailed maybe, dead... who knows? However, just because 85-90% of us are not suicidal all the time does not mean that 25% of us will not have some kind of mental health issue which is bad enough that we must seek medical help for it, because that is the stark reality. That also does not include those who stubborn it out, those whose problems are not so bad that they fall within the purview of healthcare, or any of the general unhappiness almost all of us will experience unnecessarily in our lives, nor the effect any of this has on our nearest and dearest. But hey... a) we're British and mostly male - we don't talk about feelings "it'll never happen to [insert your name]" c) it's easier to scoff, because examining the truth as it applies to us is uncomfortable Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supporters jcheeseright Posted March 18, 2013 Supporters Share Posted March 18, 2013 Your woman leave you then, James? Pff, no chance! I'm great looking, well paid, charming, intelligent and look good in uniform, she's mine til I say otherwise! (some or all of the above statements may be lies) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supporters Ian_Gere Posted March 19, 2013 Supporters Share Posted March 19, 2013 I was just wondering if the laser had 'removed the scales from her eyes' lol! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supporters jcheeseright Posted March 19, 2013 Supporters Share Posted March 19, 2013 Thankfully despite her vision at distance now being very good she still hasn't noticed that I'm a bit of a loser... so I'm guessing she's either a bit soft in the head or she's decided that she's going to carry on roughing it. Either way I'm happy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
armysurplusandtoys Posted March 19, 2013 Share Posted March 19, 2013 Its always good to have your partner on side , hope it all goes well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
two_zero Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 Its always good to have your partner on side , hope it all goes well. They 'broke up'. After the second date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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