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The best & worst quotes you have heard.


CaptainDumbass
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Walking between games at my local, see a kid (couldn't have been much older than 15/16) trying out another player's fast helmet, kid then utters "It's so light, the one I have at home is made of kevlar and is way heavier".

 

Sure, of course it is...

 

Earlier in the day, same kid is spotted during the safety brief giving his younger brother who was less than 4ft tall, and not even 13 years old, what looked like a lolly...until out comes a matchbox and the younger brother sits their casually lighting up o.O We all sit at the other side of the brief jaws dropped.

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Yesterday's game day 2 guys walking along with bright orange JBBG specials

 

2 G36C's, the younger one says 'I've got someone else's mag, it won't fucking go in' to which his mate says 'your putting it in the wrong way'

 

D'oh springs to mind

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"Your MP7 has that screw stuck too?! Must be a defect"

 

Guy had noticed the butchered screw on top rail on my 2nd hand MP7, and like it's previous owner not googled/you-tubed first to realize it was a fake screw-head before fuking it up. When i told him it was a fake screw-head he didn't really believe me at first, funny thing was he'd stopped trying to take it apart when it got to that fake screw, and has a bunch of upgrade bits that gathered dust as he hadn't got round to sending it to a shop for them to drill the screw out.

 

If he'd taken the other 3 screws out the rail would have just fallen off with bit of gravity an he'd have realized. He'd stopped after 2 :)

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Funny you should say that, we had a game at the weekend, playing search and rescue, we had to get to Fred the downed pilot, and a Dakota was doing runs overhead back and forth

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Was playing a while ago with a mate who had only just started, and had gone out and bought a two toned p90 for his first game. When talkin to him about what batteries he was using, he replied....

 

"6 double A's"

 

As mean as it was I couldn't help but have a snigle at that response.

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That reminds me of being an army cadet when some old dears (was going on a local engagement) and I heard one say 'they've sent in the army' I was only 13

 

a few years later at my sister's wedding but I was 16 by this time, again in my cadet number 1's, a very attractive young lady came on to me thinking I was a proper soldier, so I went along with it and nature more than took over :)

If that second story is true then well played mate haha
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Hand on heart mate, it's true

 

She started to come onto me when we were having the wedding reception meal, I was in the marine cadets at the time

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A group of us airsofters were walking to a game zone and passed a group of paintballers coming back the other way. I overhear one kid in the paintball group say to his friend: "These guys must be experts." Bless.

I've had similar before.

Airsofting prepping in the safe zone at the start of the day when the paintball bunch walk past in their heavily faded generic camo jump suits, when one of them exclaims "oh shit...i hope we aren't playing against them!"

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"Excuse me can I hide behind you as I keep getting shot"

 

That one made me chuckle, i'd tell em they either have to pay a protection fee or be a 90's whitney houston

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